What do you want for the 2020s? January 2, 2020 – Posted in: Advice, Confidence, Personal Development – Tags: advice, confidence, learning, personaldevelopment

If you’re anything like I used to be, you will be feeling the pressure this month to set goals and resolutions for the coming year.  And conduct an annual stocktake of sorts, perhaps. So, if you’ve read any of my January blogs over the past 8 years, you’ll know that I’ve given up with resolutions because they just don’t work!

However, I am a believer in taking stock and setting intentions; I advocate looking back before you look forwards, and the beginning of a decade gives us a great opportunity for this. So, grab a pen and paper, take half an hour, and write your answers to the following questions…

• What have the last ten years meant to you?  
• What have you learned?
• What have you achieved? 
• Who has meant the most to you?
• What would you like for the next decade?

An annual stocktake

Those you of who’ve experienced team building or leadership development programmes with me will know that I never ask anyone to do anything I wouldn’t do myself. So, in that spirit (and to get your juices flowing), you’ll find my answers to those questions below.  I truly believe that when we stop and take stock of our lives we gain a truer perspective of who we are, where we are going, how we are holding ourselves back and what we can be proud of.  I advocate an annual life stocktake – let’s stretch it to a ten-year stocktake this time in honour of it being the first month of a new decade…

What have the last ten years meant to you?  

The last ten years have all been about liberation for me. The liberation of myself (from living an unhappy life based on the ’shoulds’ and ‘oughts’ of that critical voice (ego), to one based on living plugged into a wiser, more authentic voice). And the liberation of the people I work with by helping them to do the same.

A decade ago I was a very scared 37 year-old mother of three little girls (they were 5, 2 and 1) who knew she was unhappy but had no idea that change was possible (or allowed). A decade ago I looked to other people for approval, answers and permissions.  A decade ago we had just enough to live on, but I feared paying the mortgage each month. A decade ago I dreamed of living a peaceful, powerful life but I had no clue how to create that.  Today, I am no longer scared, I am deeply happy (contented) and I look inside for answers.  Today, I know that if I can do it, so can you, which is why I do the job I do.

What have you learned?

That my ego lies to me, using fear as its weapon of choice.

That giving is so much more fun than getting.

That love is really all that matters.

That it’s okay to walk away from abusive people (no matter how long they have been in your life).

That motherhood is the most incredible privilege (I knew this before but I know it even more now!)

That wisdom lies at the depths of every human being.

That in any situation I have three choices; accept it, change it, or walk away from it.

That as I give to the world, so the world gives to me.

That connection is the probably why we’re all here – it certainly drives most people.

That I need to look after my body, mind and spirit.  They are all interconnected, so good food, exercise, meditation, good books, music, and time with good people are essential to the every day.

That true love cannot be manufactured, but when it does come into your life it will bring more joy than you thought possible.

That success is built one step, one decision, one day at a time.

That everything starts with a thought…

What have you achieved? 

Ever deepening authenticity.

Who has meant the most to you?

My girls and my husband – the four special people I come home home to every day.  

Also, those people in my life who lovingly say it how it is.

My clients who have so bravely allowed me into their minds and their hearts – it has been my absolute honour to work with each of you.

What would you like for the next decade?

Honestly?  More of the same please.  I want my work reach more people; I’ll publish more books, hold more events, speak to bigger audiences, and work with as many people as I can in person.  I love my job – here’s to more of it!